Shark Attack 3: Megalodon

2.9
2002 1 hr 39 min Adventure , Horror , Action , Thriller

When two researchers discover a colossal shark's tooth off the Mexican coast their worst fears surface - the most menacing beast to ever rule the waters is still alive and mercilessly feeding on anything that crosses its path. Now they must hunt the fierce killer and destroy it... before there is no one left to stop it

  • Cast:
    John Barrowman , Jenny McShane , Ryan Cutrona , Bashar Rahal , George Stanchev , Ivo Tonchev , Anya Pencheva

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Reviews

Diagonaldi
2002/11/26

Very well executed

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ReaderKenka
2002/11/27

Let's be realistic.

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CommentsXp
2002/11/28

Best movie ever!

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Maidexpl
2002/11/29

Entertaining from beginning to end, it maintains the spirit of the franchise while establishing it's own seal with a fun cast

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Rob_Taylor
2002/11/30

I just can't! I just watched Jurassic Shark before this and that WAS a big stinking turd pile. Shark Attack 3, by comparison, is a masterpiece (okay, it isn't, but it sure seems that way!).From start to finish, SA3 is filled with the following: 1. Hammy acting. There is a whole pig farm of ham in this movie! The quality reminded me of those cheesy early 80's VHS movies. Barrowman is by far the best actor in the movie, but even he seems to be finding the whole thing hilarious.2. Stock shark footage. The beast of the movie is entirely stock footage lifted from documentaries. That said, there are some hysterically funny superimposition shots, where the shark is matted in with another scene, usually an "eating" moment. These are priceless! 3. Terrible miniature effects. The helicopter is my favourite, but most vessels end up as poorly filmed models that look very unconvincing.4. The shark has a bad tummy-ache. Yes, in every scene of the shark, it is making a noise like an upset stomach. No wonder considering it eats anything it comes across! Despite all of these things, the movie is so bad that is good! So I can't rate it a 1. Sorry! I'll go as low as a 3, but I really think it's worth a 5, it's that ridiculous and funny.

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Bezenby
2002/12/01

Ah, this is a fun one to watch. I'm sure the makers of this film were fully aware of what they were making, but I can say without a doubt I enjoyed this more than Jaws 2, 3 or The Revenge. It's full of action, gore, nudity, stupidity, pearl white teeth, stock footage, one-liners, dubbing, crap effects and is never boring for a minute. It's like the film makers were channelling Bruno Mattei - it's that good! However, if you're one of them 'serious' film fans you might want to steer clear. I don't have a brain, and therefore was mightily impressed by this bundle of nonsense. For some reason, the shark makes noises like a guy in a porn movie.

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Chase_Witherspoon
2002/12/02

When a Tom Cruise look-a-like coastal patrolman finds a tooth embedded in a submarine electricity cable, a palaeontologist identifies it as a Megalodon tooth, a giant prehistoric shark thought to have been extinct for eons. Of course, the title animal is very much alive, and to make matters worse, it's just a baby! Mother takes some time to surface, but when she eventually does, nothing on the water is safe from her mile-wide gape.If a movie can be remembered by a solitary, improvised line of dialogue, then this film will defy age and ineptitude for centuries to come. Fortunately, there's more to a movie than a one-liner that will have you choking on your marshmallow, and this one doesn't have the substance to rate amongst its peers.The Meg (as it's affectionately known) is a preposterous sized beast, capable of swallowing a powerboat whole, without so much as a gag reflex. Trick photographic effects are clumsy and amateurish looking, with various bystanders falling from a stricken pleasure cruiser into the open jaws of the mammoth, prehistoric specimen. Some stock crowd footage and a scene in which two randy lovers are devoured was lifted (almost unerringly) and used in the contemporary Shark Zone, but to cite that imitation is to ascribe this farce a tribute it neither earns nor deserves.Characterisations are exaggerated in their intensity, and even some of the more capable cast members are laughable caricatures, particularly Ryan Cutrona as the macho ex-navy seal who reveals the sinister cause behind the colossal resurrection. Despite the lack of redeemable qualities, there's still that inimitable one-liner, and a few other memorable quotes at which to laugh. And since it's featured prominently in this review, don't despair about mistaking that line – it's easily identified.

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Christian Baer (Gullytrotter)
2002/12/03

When I decided to watch this flick, I already had a hunch that it would stink. There were enough hints in the Web and from people I know personally to tell me that. But I didn't care. The Megalodon has somehow fascinated me ever since I learned of its (former) existence as a child. I always wanted to see this giant shark in comparison to a human - not just as a drawing in a book.Well, this movies really does stink. And with that I mean just about every aspect. The dialogs themselves and the related editing are of a quality you find in cheap porn movies. After just about every dialog-scene you expect to see a girl go to her knees for (the obvious). The voices sound pathetic and some actors even seem to have trouble remembering their single-liners!This is the kind of movie where you repeatedly want to shout "Bull!" at the screen. The actions and reactions of the characters are just too pathetic, sharks bitten in half by the giant monster shark are later seen in one piece lying on the beach and so on. In many cases the actions of the victims are likely to cause an accident even without the shark around (like driving a speedboat while drunk).The one pretence I had (seeing Megalodon in comparison with humans) wasn't fulfilled. The special effects were just too corny. They might as well have used scenes from Futurama. I mean really, nobody would have noticed. There were so many scenes taken from other footage like documentaries. The lighting and colour balance was completely different, but what the heck? Nobody will notice. Or did they?Normally, I don't really care much for boobs in movies, because they are usually there to distract from the flaws. In Shark Attack 3 the flaws are big enough to make the few seconds with boobs and pretty girls the only scenes worth seeing. And I can hardly believe I just wrote that!At first, I couldn't really understand, why there are so many reviews stating that their authors laughed throughout the whole movie. When I think about it, I can understand them quite well now. I mean, where else can you learn so many unique things? Here is a rather incomplete list:Megalodon is a morphing shark that can change its size depending on what it wants to swallow, like a person, a boat or whatever.Although Megalodon's teeth look nearly exactly like the teeth of a great white (apart from the size), a crappy digital photo of one baby tooth (without anything to compare its size to) is enough to let one (and only one) paleontologist identify the animal within a second.The first thing every paleontologist does during a "non-break" at night is read the shark forum.Megalodon could survive in the very dark and rather foodless deep sea trenches for at least 1.6 million years, even though all evidence makes Megalodon a fast-swimming predator that hunts close to the surface by sight when its prey is near and has a metabolism to match (Megalodon is considered to be one of the Lamnidae, which is the same family as the great white and mako shark).If you take a photo of a shark's tooth, it doesn't matter that you are holding and covering it on one side with your fat thumb. The camera will still get the complete tooth.Digicams only catch the main motive, none of the background.Text in the internet is always in big coloured letters.Divers take along their dogs so they can play Frisbee with them on the beach after diving.If a creature which is supposed to be extinct suddenly shows up (thus not being extinct and an actual scientific sensation), even the scientists will want to kill the animal (with a torpedo).Mini-subs that from the outside look about the size of a portable toilet have enough room inside for two seats, a place to put on a diving suit, an air lock and even room to spare for a small BBQ-party.Submarines are controlled by game pads.Fitting an unarmed mini-sub with a torpedo-launcher that could sink a battleship is a small task for an otherwise boring afternoon.A 20m shark can attack a 100m superyacht making it shake as if it would capsize any second, although the difference in weight between the fish and the boat is like an ant kicking a brick.When your yacht is being attacked by a giant monster shark, the first thing you'll want to do is go outside and climb up to the slippery places without any railing, just to make sure you fall into the water the next time the shark gives the boat a thump. If for some reason you don't fall into the water, JUMP! After all, the water is much safer than a giant yacht if a hungry shark is around.Mexico is somewhere in south-east Europe.Attacking sharks make weird creepy sounds with their voice.Girls that have to be saved from the giant shark have been rubbed down with olive oil to make them too slippery to save.A torpedo that could sink a battleship blows the shark and the sub it was launched from to kingdom come while leaving a human who is close enough to smell the shark's fish-breath uninjured (apart from a good shake down).If you want a boring laugh, go watch it. The fact that one dirty pick-up line is the only thing that ever got known about this movie should give you a hint. Even the synopsis on the DVD-cover is completely wrong!

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