Evil Alien Conquerors
Inept beings from the planet Kabijj land on Earth and attempt to behead all of its beings and take over the planet
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- Cast:
- Michael Weston , Diedrich Bader , Chris Parnell , Tyler Labine , Elden Henson , Beth Grant , Missy Yager
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Reviews
Thanks for the memories!
Don't listen to the negative reviews
Yo, there's no way for me to review this film without saying, take your *insert ethnicity + "ass" here* to see this film,like now. You have to see it in order to know what you're really messing with.
This movie feels like it was made purely to piss off people who want good shows
Never will one find a better candidate for a cult film. The film starts strong with a really funny theme song (which gets 3 totally different versions during the film) which will have you singing along in no time and a intro scene that wastes no time setting the tone for the film. The cast comprises a really excellent group of comic talent that never falls short just because of all the improvising and the small budget.The sheer genius behind this film is astonishing. What if a really bizarre planet decided to attack earth by sending two (not-so) supreme beings, in purple pajamas, armed only with swords and a make-up compact to behead the entire human race in 2 1/2 days? What if you made the biggest use of your sponsorship budget by including repetitive and absurd product placement in almost every scene? You would get one of the funniest outcomes you can imagine.I cannot imagine how long most of the scenes took to film, because I would not have been able to finish half of my lines without cracking up. Not everyone get's this films humor right away, but stick with it as many of the dumb little things near the beginning come back to build into big laughs later on.The acting is good... and far better than most "B" movies will ever give you. Chris Parnell and Diedrich Bader give solid starring character performances, Michael Weston is not as solid, but works out well in the balance. The true star of this film is actually Tyler Labine (Zack and Miri Make a Porno, Sons Of Tucson...) as Kroker. Kroker is the funniest movie character ever.Do you and your friends enjoy exchanging obscure "one-liner" quotes with each other? Would you agree that sometimes more ridiculous is better? Have you ever pretended to be a giant stomping around and screaming (or laughed at someone who did)? If you refuse to answer any of these questions on the grounds of self-incrimination, then this movie is for you!Don't forget to stock up on Smirnoff Ice, Crystal Geyser and Sun-Chips before you start the movie - you will need them.
No, dude, you're actually about 5 foot 6 and shorter than almost every other person you run into...ah...do you not get that? I guess that's why this movie is "funny." Okay, enough snark. This movie actually is funny, if you like stupid, annoying humor. It comes at you full throttle with an absurd premise and distractingly low production values. Seriously, what was the budget on this thing? It looked like a film school production, to be honest. That low.Two aliens come to earth with orders to behead the entire human race. It becomes clear pretty fast that they have vastly overestimated their prowess and vastly underestimated the resources needed to accomplish their task. Oh well, it's all good actually, because they decide that Earth is a pretty cool place, loaded with fast food, Smirnoff Ice, extremely entertaining infomercials and the genius of Supertramp.Dedrich Bader and Chris Parnell go through the whole movie in footy pajamas, people. Footy freaking pajamas. And so does the "giant" from their alien world, come to make sure they have taken over Earth, CROKER, who is actually shorter than both of them. Nevertheless, he keeps screaming about the fact that he is 100 feet tall and is going to crush everyone with his giant feet. He also wears footy pajamas. Purple ones.If this sounds like your cup of tea, your showcase of all-out idiocy, then be sure to check it out. Or if you like the idea of Dedrich Bader and Chris Parnell running through some deserted suburban town at night in footy pajamas, then by all means, 90 minutes of your life is just waiting to be expended. Really stupid, but I guess in this case that is not an insult.
This movie has a lot of promise. It failed. I love a movie where Tori Spelling just looks beautiful, yet does not speak. She is so magnetically attractive. Yet---she speaks. Speaking is a bad habit for little old Tori. I guess Tori Spelling is the female version of Tom Cruise. This movie is a sorry mess, where an actor who just yells is given more than twenty minutes of screen time: namely Croaker. The lead actor, what's his name, the loser/fry cook, is actually interesting. Also, Dietrich Bader, provides acting ability, otherwise absent from this movie. Bader is far superior to this mess. This is a goofy movie that fails to be goofy. It is a failure. Michael Weston, the fry cook/loser, is acceptably good enough as the 20-something guy. The amateur acting throughout this film is not acceptable. This kind of movie-making actually vaulted the series Star Trek to fame. I am cool with that.
This movie is about two "evil alien conquerors" who must behead every human on earth within 2 1/2 days or a giant from their planet will come and behead them AND everyone on Earth. Now, it's not for everyone, I know. But it is SO FUNNY just because of it's absurdities. For instance, Crokar (the GIANT from their home planet) comes out of the portal the same size as everyone else, but he still thinks he's GIANT. (watch the movie and you'll see why I capitalize that.) Basically, it's a slightly absurd, stupid movie that you have to laugh at. My friends and I joked about it for hours (and still do). It's a great movie to see with friends.