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The Beauties and the Beast
Girls in the woods are terrorized by an Abominable Snowman-type beast.
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- Cast:
- Jacqueline Giroux , Uschi Digard , Colleen Brennan , Sandy Carey , Tracy Handfuss
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Reviews
Just what I expected
It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.
It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.
Watching it is like watching the spectacle of a class clown at their best: you laugh at their jokes, instigate their defiance, and "ooooh" when they get in trouble.
I love how this movie opens with an sincere on screen narration about scientific facts, examples of newspaper clippings and alleged factual sightings of an American Sasquatch monster, and then stupidly continues by saying "the story you're about to see COULD be true ". Well of course it could be true! Stuff like this happens all the time! Not a week goes by or I read something in the papers about lewd and nakedly parading around wenches getting abducted in the woods by Sasquatch himself! "Beauties and the Beast", like the title implies, is a rancid and utterly nonsensical sexploitation product of the early 70's; simultaneously cashing in on the Bigfoot hype in horror cinema at that time as well as benefiting from the always popular concept of voluptuous girls practicing the Free Love principles. It's Big-foot meeting Big-boobs, as Russ Meyer regular Uschi Digard (with her lovely Scandinavian accent and her even lovelier triple-D balcony) and her friend drive up to a remote cabin in the woods where a big and perverted guy in an ape suit resides. In earlier sequences we already witnessed how he collects scarcely dressed girls and stores them in a cave without even sexually harassing them. Now, that is weird! I personally expected at least one repulsive monstrous rape-sequence, to be honest. Anyway, the girls encounter a bunch of hippies (who have been there since 8 months but never spotted the Yeti ) and subsequently some thugs in search of golden coins, so the monster never really has a proper chance to demonstrate to Uschi what a hot date he is. "Beauties and the Beast" is a pretty lousy but undeniably entertaining piece of trash, with a large amount of unintentionally hilarious sequences (for example the guy running away naked upon spotting the Sasquatch; leaving his girlfriend behind) and harmlessly tame sexual footage. The last fifteen minutes are quite strange. It feels as if, after a whole movie of redundant sex images and pointless padding, the story suddenly becomes ambitious and eventful. There's violence and rape, new characters and the titular beast actually becomes the day-saving hero! In the end, they all live happily ever after in harmony, and nobody even bothers anymore about the Yeti's first victims, who are mostly likely still entrapped in the cave.
I'm not sure if Beauties and the Beast is a movie or just a compilation of someone's home movies. The plot, if you can call it that, involves a Bigfoot type creature terrorizing a bunch of hippies and nudists in the woods. The creature looks more like a guy wearing a black bathroom rug and false teeth than an actual Bigfoot. He kidnaps girl after girl taking them to his blanket furnished cave. He gropes them a couple of times and that's about it. I have no idea what happened to this girls or if they ever escaped. This film doesn't bother with things like that. In reality, Beauties and the Beast is a cheap, poorly made, and horribly acted excuse of a softcore porn film. Everything is simply awful. I can't think of any reason, and that includes the generous supply of nudity, to recommend this one to anyone. It's just so gawd awful! And if you must watch this thing, beware of the soundtrack. It's a two pronged assault against the senses. First, there's the generic, overly-sappy elevator music. It almost put me to sleep on a couple of occasions (that, and the dull movie). Second, one of the hippies insists on singing a folk song. I think my ears may still be bleeding.
It's a wonder this film is not available from Something Weird Video. Some movies wait until the end to show the monsters. Not this one. Bigfoot is grabbing women from the get go. At the end we never even find out what happened to the women in his cave! Who cares about the loose ends. What matters is that there were sex scenes with hairy males... and Bigfoot gets to do some molestin' too. A couple of the girls are beautiful. The film teases for a while, cutting away several times right before showing nudity below the belt. Be patient. I had to be very patient since my VHS tape did not play on the first two VCR's I tried it on. A mostly silly movie with even sillier music plus one brutal rape attempt. See it.
A very ragged-looking voyeuristic Bigfoot kidnaps girls to keep in his cave for no apparent reason whatsoever. Enter two girls vacationing at a cabin (one of whom is Ushi Digard who can barely speak English) who meet up with a small group of hippies. Soon they're all attacked by some bad guys looking for their stash until Bigfoot shows up. This is a shoddy production all around with sex scenes that go on WAAAY too long. There is one bizarre dream sequence of a showdown between two girls wearing only gun belts and boots. Recommended only to liberal-minded Bigfoot completists only.