Thanks for the memories!

Simply A Masterpiece

This story has more twists and turns than a second-rate soap opera.

It is an exhilarating, distressing, funny and profound film, with one of the more memorable film scores in years,

Wow.. Yep wow. "White Fire" is one of those films you got to see to believe. That's action fans. Of schlock and exploitation. Well maybe if you got a thing for Robert Ginty… and throw in Fred "Hammer" Williamson. And some gnarly chainsaw carnage. Don't hesitate, check it out. The film is just so outrageous (although not rousing), but more so reckless and incomprehensible. Just figuring out what's going it just as bemusing as trying to understand the unusually repressed relationship between brother (Ginty) and sister (Belinda Mayne). It is strange. Like numerous touchy-feely encounters and awkward dialogues ("A pity you're my sister" while staring at her nude body and she doesn't seem to realise she's fully naked by only covering her breasts), which will have you returning back to scenes to make sure you heard it right. Nonetheless the entire script is clumsy. Acting is stiff (Mirella Banti gets top prize followed by Gordon Mitchell) and terrible dubbing also helps. After a pointless beginning; I guess to show why this brother and sister were so close suddenly moves into present time 20 years later where siblings Beau Donnelly and Ingrid are adventurous diamond thieves. Ingrid is working in a desert diamond mind smuggling the goods with the help of her brother and the base's security commander. When they come across that of the white diamond they see it as their final heist to get out of the business. But it won't be that easy, as there are other people who are keen on getting their hands on the diamond. I find Ginty rather agreeable in the lead role, where he has that expression you're never too sure what he is actually thinking. Great poker face. And he does hand out some beatings. While Mayne was somewhat wooden, you can see why she got the tick of approval. Then there's bad-ass Williamson, who really doesn't show up until an hour in with his pals (this gang really does like to show off their chest hair) and his energy really does get things moving. Like his first appearance ("I detest psychical violence"). Too bad about the cheery ending though, as I hoping to see Ginty and Williamson come to blows. It actually takes awhile before we come face-to-face with the legendary white fire diamond which burns whoever touches it. Williamson's smooth-talking trouble- shooter character has nothing to do with this side of the story, but more so with film's midway twist that only seems to make the brother- sister relationship even creepier. Watch how Ginty dramatically fights his desires for his sister (?). It cuts him deep. There's a lot going on and characters coming and going. Not complex, but messy and patchwork that it's hard to make sense of it. But some might call that intrigue with soapy elements. But the siblings sure knew how to find trouble. I say it was simply written on the spot. It was just too random. Now the action was staged like if an opera singer was preparing for a big solo. Low-grade, but frenetic and plentiful with some touches of tacky gore with it cuing in marital arts sound effects and one very torturous encounter that will have men feeling squeamish. Plus it's probably got one of the slowest vehicle chases ever caught on tape. Flabby direction with some makeshift, mundane camera-work. It's cheap, inept and it shows. The tripped-out soundtrack is a real winner too. You get an amazing title song that finds it way on a loop. Rough around the edges, but this feverish b-grade drive-in outing has no pretensions, so try keeping a straight face. "Remember take good care of my sister".

It is important that you watch the big box TWE VHS tape which has a clear vibrant picture instead of the fuzzy washed out DVD put out by Westlake entertainment. Like many old movies, the DVD is made from a far inferior print to the VHS. You really want a nice clear look at Belinda Mayne's body.There are a couple of scenes that make this movie a classic. The one that comes to mind is Spectacular Belinda Mayne taking a nude swim and providing full frontal nudity view of her spectacular body. Think a Ursula Andress, but better looking and nude. After some playful banter with her brother, Ingrid (Belinda's character) is attacked by a gang and uses martial arts while wearing only a white towel to kill or dispatch them.The movie is fun, campy and watchable. You might also enjoy the sadistic female villain.

Superbly trashy and wondrously unpretentious 80's exploitation, hooray! The pre-credits opening sequences somewhat give the false impression that we're dealing with a serious and harrowing drama, but you need not fear because barely ten minutes later we're up until our necks in nonsensical chainsaw battles, rough fist-fights, lurid dialogs and gratuitous nudity! Bo and Ingrid are two orphaned siblings with an unusually close and even slightly perverted relationship. Can you imagine playfully ripping off the towel that covers your sister's naked body and then stare at her unshaven genitals for several whole minutes? Well, Bo does that to his sister and, judging by her dubbed laughter, she doesn't mind at all. Sick, dude! Anyway, as kids they fled from Russia with their parents, but nasty soldiers brutally slaughtered mommy and daddy. A friendly smuggler took custody over them, however, and even raised and trained Bo and Ingrid into expert smugglers. When the actual plot lifts off, 20 years later, they're facing their ultimate quest as the mythical and incredibly valuable White Fire diamond is coincidentally found in a mine. Very few things in life ever made as little sense as the plot and narrative structure of "White Fire", but it sure is a lot of fun to watch. Most of the time you have no clue who's beating up who or for what cause (and I bet the actors understood even less) but whatever! The violence is magnificently grotesque and every single plot twist is pleasingly retarded. The script goes totally bonkers beyond repair when suddenly – and I won't reveal for what reason – Bo needs a replacement for Ingrid and Fred Williamson enters the scene with a big cigar in his mouth and his sleazy black fingers all over the local prostitutes. Bo's principal opponent is an Italian chick with big breasts but a hideous accent, the preposterous but catchy theme song plays at least a dozen times throughout the film, there's the obligatory "we're-falling-in-love" montage and loads of other attractions! My God, what a brilliant experience. The original French title translates itself as "Life to Survive", which is uniquely appropriate because it makes just as much sense as the rest of the movie: None!

WARNING SPOILERS CONTAINED HEREIN. White Fire is a mish mash of ludicrous mayhem. Trying to explain the plot is as pointless as this movie. Don't get me wrong, I love this movie! It has gratuitous nudity, senseless violence, a bizarre incest thing going on, bar room brawls, Russian Roulette, awful rock and roll songs, an all-women cult of (lesbian?) plastic surgeons, and Fred Williamson shows up as a macho pimp trying to get one of his ho's back. Great scenes: Robert Ginty with a chainsaw vs. thugs with meat hooks; ridiculous looking Battlestar Galactica-like uniforms; unrealistic, yet brutal gore scenes and oh-so-much more! Did I mention bad acting? This is what makes low budget b-movies fun to watch. Although the plot gets more illogical as the movie goes on, you just never know what's going to happen next.Questions such as "What?!" "Huh...?" and "Why?" will pop into your head. "And what exactly is white fire?" you ask. Well, it's a giant radioactive diamond, of course! All who touch it get burned. The moral of the story, I guess, is that greed will burn you in the end.This wonderful spectacle is available in the U.S., so hunt it down.