Truly Dreadful Film

Really Surprised!

Your blood may run cold, but you now find yourself pinioned to the story.

The joyful confection is coated in a sparkly gloss, bright enough to gleam from the darkest, most cynical corners.

This was a great documentary. A story of child abuse. The aftermath of sexual abuse usually exposes itself once the victim is in a safe relationship with their spouse, as an adult. The next thing you know, everything falls apart. Thank goodness they had each other and God.I felt close to the families journey of self discovery. The marital confusion on Tony's quick descent to rock bottom. The strain on their marriage. The impact on their family and community. All of these gripping emotions were clearly portrayed in the film.I am proud of this family for spreading their message. It was a truly profound step in their recovery.Prayer Honors God. God Honors Prayer.

As someone who was raised Catholic in Toledo, I found this very well-done, low-budget film to be incredibly compelling and real. While I personally never experienced abuse, many of my classmates and I had very strong relationships with the priests that worked in our parishes and schools. Watching on film the Archbishop (who was present at my Confirmation) so badly handle the revelation of the abuse was hard. But this film helped me understand the full ramifications of the abuse scandal. I liked that the film never allows itself to overly dramatize what is an incredibly painful and divisive situation. It simply shows the real impact of sexual abuse on a single man and his family. I just read another comment for this film, and it was less about the film and more about a particular viewer's political views on Church abuse. That anyone could watch this film and question the motivation of Comes is really difficult to imagine and sad. But of course -- as the film shows -- many people find it easier to further persecute victims of abuse than face the truth about the leaders of their faith.

This is probably one of the hardest documentaries I've ever watched, it really does hit you like a punch in the face from the outset. I can honestly say this film had me deep in thought, uneasy, laughing and crying, and that's what a movie should do. Unfortunately this subject matter shouldn't even exist for it to be brought to people to understand through film.This is an intimate journey alongside the family and friends of a man who has been subject to years of sexual abuse by the locally trusted Catholic Priest. It shows his attempts to come to terms with what has happened and how it affects him in later years, and not just him but his wife, his children, his family and friends, and even the others who have been abused in the past. It's one of the most powerful movies I've seen in recent years.I've noticed something different in this documentary that doesn't seem to carry with others I've seen to date, and that's in its determination to keep track of the focus of the story, Tony Comes, and yet it manages extremely well to show the effect to so many around him. The stories, attitude and confusion of so many other people are brought clearly into the film without taking away from his story, or dropping the focus from the pain and torment that is going through his life. It does manage to present a startling picture of how so many are affected by the sexual abuse of a person, and how the memory follows someone through their life all the while eating away at them at every single moment and through every single thought.It doesn't preach, or seem to angle towards illiciting an effect from the audience for some social change or promotion of anger against the Church. What it does do, clear and simply, is show the Comes family story.The movie is superbly edited. To imagine that the makers had so much footage and edited it down to a manageable amount that could keep Comes story focused and strong despite breaking off to tell the tales of his friends and family, and still retain the close feeling of intimacy of the whole piece, is remarkable work.So many times documentary films can become something else, lose sight of what they were meant to be about or just dilute their message with cinema, whereas this film has exploited the medium to the utmost. It has successfully presented Comes story in such a way as to grab the audience and ask them why this has been allowed to happen, taking you to the window of these peoples lives and letting you look inside to see what harm has come to these real people.For me, this is what this movie is about. It takes you into the heart of the Comes family and forces you to face things that you would not normally want to see. You don't want to know that people are abused, especially by those that some hold so sacred, and you don't want to see the pain and suffering that travels throughout the families affected.During the scenes in Comes truck or at his home, when the camera was simply with him, I would forget that I was and really feel as though I was sitting in that cab with him. By the end I held a sense of knowing Comes and his Wife, not in the sense of a friend, but in that they are real genuine people, and their warmth and compassion came through so easily on screen, something I found incredibly emotional to watch at times.There are a few truly hard scenes, of which I won't go into. Yes, it is painful, very upsetting and it will make you cry, but there is a lot of good to be had out of this film.For one there is the amazing quality of faith found in humans. For me this was the hardest part, how Tony could contemplate anything to do with the Church after these events is beyond me, I even shouted at the screen for him to "wise up"! Not being a believer of Church or any organised religions, I found this particularly hard, but I saw the positive affects on the family and the strength it gave them. This was something unique and quite amazing.Another moment, and something that the film showed me about myself, was when Tony's young daughter has gone to bed and he walks in to settle with her and hold her for comfort. My thoughts were uncomfortable and nervous, and yet this was a moment like any other between a Father and Daughter. A particularly powerful moment for me that demonstrates what Tony himself says when he talks about when and how often the memories of the past affect him.Above all, it showed that you should not keep quiet about events in the past, and you shouldn't stand by when others commit crimes against people and cover them up for anyones sake. If this film tells us anything, it's that the act of silence in itself is a crime and that those who knew the priest was responsible should have stood up, taken responsibility and acted. Instead the burden was left with this poor young boy who has grown to be a strong but troubled man. Regardless of this movie, I applaud him and his family for where they are today, and I wish them all the peace in the world.I urge you to watch this documentary. It's one of the most powerful I've seen, and it tells an often sad and painful tale that is happening all too often in our lives today. Yet it does come out with some profound and wonderful moments of human existence, and it shows what a great family the Comes are, and in particular Tony and Wendy.

Think of me as you will. My opinion is based on the film and it's message and not the Mr. Comes, just to make things clear. This film is supposed to show the traumaitzation of a man who was abused by a member of the Catholic Church when he was a young "boy". The problem with the whole story is, the stories that are being told are from men who claim to been abused at the ages from 12- 16. They say that they were unaware of what was happening to them and that they (the victim) would wake up and there was a man from the Church having their way with them. These story tellers say that at the time they weren't sure what was happening and that they let it occur. Right off the bat, I would say that those statements have no validity. In and around the age of thirteen, teenagers know about sex in way or another. You learn it from school, society, or family. To say you don't seems to be the way to cope with allowing your curiosity to happen. I remember I was in the fifth grade when we were given the crash course on sex, so at that age I was 10 or 11. Things that weren't taught (obviously) I learned from peers. So at that age I was aware of what sex was and would have some sort of idea of what may have been happening. What the story tellers also fail to mention is that they weren't coming forth about the abuse (if that's what they thought it was then) to anyone. Not parents of friends, or any one else in the Church. They allowed it to happen and happen multiple times. I mean, once they were 16 and the abuse was continuing, there was no excuse that they would still have no idea what was happening. They show a man referred to "John Doe" who remembers being drunk and naked and being in bed with a alleged sex offender and nothing else. He goes on how that experience disturbed him, but then he recalls experimenting with this man. How? First he said he didn't remember, but remembers everything else and was disturbed, but then allowed it to happen on another occasion. Why? This is only one small example, there are many other points that are trying to be made that get spun around based on the reactions and delays of the "victims" described in the film. Another example (a large one at that) is that even though one person in the film claims he is haunted by what happened everyday and that he is against the church (due to a lawsuit he's filed about 18 years later), the Church is still a big part of his life. He was married in a Catholic Church, sent his daughter to a Catholic school, and we see her receive her first Communion. And feeling all this bitterness and frustration with the church, he goes in and accepts Communion with his daughter. Once again, if this is all so traumatic and one claims to be abused or raped and lied too, why go back to this church? Why accept Communion, something sacred to this church? It's backwards. It's things like this that hurt the credibility of this film and it's story tellers. It rides the wake to a major controversy in America. It doesn't seem like a documentary, but like a movie of fiction. It tries to strike emotions with circumstances that seemed staged. The point and message of this film is lost with it's irony. I feel sorry for the story tellers not because of what they claim has happened, but because this film hurts what they have to say.to the film makers, this is a bad film.D- To all of you users here on IMDb, I stand by what I say. It's simple psychology since we are now being told a story decades down the road from what they claim happened. Over the years stories stretch and wear, till the very foundation has changed. I still find this movie to be dis-miss able. And personally to colorscheme, my review of a bad film was straight forward to the point using references from the film, therefore I am backing up my opinion so you can see for yourself. It's your review that has the wide array of emotions, not mine. I told you to think of me as you will, but truth be told and I'll say it again, this movie is awful and has a message lost in translation.