One of my all time favorites.

I wanted to but couldn't!

As Good As It Gets

This is a gorgeous movie made by a gorgeous spirit.

Cowboy private eye and studly ladies' man par excellence Cody Abilene (an affable performance by the hunky Darby Hinton) gets involved in a complex plot involving black and espionage while investigating the murder of a rich lady's husband. Writer/director Andy Sidaris relates the slight'n'silly story at a constant snappy pace and maintains a winningly breezy'n'easy tongue-in-cheek tone throughout. Moreover, Sidaris milks plenty of goofy laughs from a comic relief redneck family who always challenge Cody to an automobile race and Cody's hopeless ineptitude with handling firearms. Best of all, a bevy of beautiful babes happily bare their tasty wares with pleasing frequency: the always delectable Sybil Danning is in fine sultry form as the cunning and enticing Contessa Luciana, Lori Sutton burns up the screen as saucy cop Beverly, buxom blonde bombshell Lynda Wiesmeier has a field day as busty'n'lusty stock car race driver June Khnockers, and yummy Playboy Playmates Lorraine Michaels, Kimberly McArthur, and Barbara Edwards all dutifully doff their duds in the name of cheerfully leering exploitation. Veteran character actor Art Metrano has a cool supporting part as hot-tempered foul-mouthed goon Matthew while Brett Clark is suitably slimy as sleazy chauffeur Shane. The surprisingly convoluted narrative keeps the viewer guessing right until the very end. Howard Wexler's sunny cinematography gives the picture an attractive bright look. Henry Strzelecki's twangy countryish score hits the harmonic spot. Good blithely trashy fun.

I believe that in order to enjoy an Andy Sidaris movie, you must be a REALLY undemanding viewer, accepting that story-telling takes a back seat to showing as much bare female flesh as possible along with a fair amount of violence(..carried out in a more tongue-in-cheek way). While the plot in Malibu Express does become rather needlessly convoluted, Sidaris doesn't allow it to get in the way of delivering plenty of fake tits and athletic bodies. Darby Hinton, the star of the film(..modeled after the looks of a Jameson Parker or Chuck Norris)is all smiles, as well as he should be considering the amount of ladies who offer their bodies to him, as a private eye put on the case of uncovering the identity of the person behind selling computer chip secrets to the Russians. Soon he is involved in uncovering the person involved in the murder of a butler / driver who was blackmailing the household of a rich wheel-chair bound aristocrat, Lady Lillian Chamberlain(Niki Dantine).It all ties to a businessman whose being supplied monetary funds from Lady Lillian's daughter, Liza(Lorraine Michaels). He sends his muscle after Cody(Hinton), needing to recover some film shot by Shane(Brett Clark), the butler before he died after the killer shot and stabbed him. The film has the face of the killer who was escaping after removing a tape from Shane's video recorder. Sybil Danning has a minor role as Contessa Luciana, an agent who not only hires Cody but is one of his (many)lovers as well. Well, Danning is here basically to show a little skin, mostly in a teeny bikini or gowns which are designed to showcase her figure and big jugs. Practically the entire female cast hired by Sidaris are nude models and Playboy bunnies, and Cody gets plenty of action(..as does Clark who not only beds Lady Lillian's daughter, Liza, but her daughter-in-law, Anita, played by Shelley Taylor Morgan, as well)in the process.Thrown in the mix is this family of hicks who constantly challenge Cody to street races and a female cop, Beverly(Lori Sutton), who assists him in his case..among other things. Unveiled as Cody works on the case is that Lillian's son, Stuart(Michael A Andrews), married to Anita, is gay(..and moonlights as a transvestite,), one of three Shane was attempting to extort. Cody's affair with a race car driver, June Khnockers(..yuck, yuck), is played for laughs when he uses her vehicle to evade the trio of assassins after the role of film..Lynda Wiesmeier is always pulling out her tits, often getting the attention she seeks after. Another gag is two honeys who have a boat docked on the same harbor as Cody, always calling on him for a little hanky panky, with him often too busy to take them up on their offers. It's important to understand what you are getting yourself into when popping in an Andy Sidaris movie because his work doesn't exactly appeal to the head on your shoulders..if you catch my drift.

Darby Hinton stars as a private eye (Who looks like a cross between Chuck Norris and Tom Selleck) who investigates espionage, murder and all kinds of fun stuff while getting laid lots and lots of times. Malibu Express is probably for what it's worth the best movie from Andy Sidaris on a technical level. Of course in my opinion his only other watchable movie was Hard Ticket To Hawaii, anyway Malibu Express has some okay action sequences (Even though Hinton's martial arts sequences are badly staged) and features tons of nudity which is the film's main selling point. The story is completely plot less and extremely hard to follow mainly due to the fact that none of the plot threads are ever pursued in a way that would make this work as a mystery. In fact the ending merely explains the outcome because the movie forgets to connect the dots earlier. Basically this is a plot less and rather goofy affair which works better as comedy than it does as action or mystery.* * Out of 4-(Fair)

Hinton is charmingly alluring; the plot is inconsequential.From his cute days as Daniel Boone's son he has developed into a very handsome man - and you see "most" of him in this soft core flick along with costar Brent Clark who has a HOT shower scene. Actually Darby's most fleshy scene is also in the shower (great ass but no frontal male nudity in this film). Pool views of his torso, however, are definitely eye-candy. There is also a lot of attractive female skin for those who seek it, but not to the point that this is exclusively a "guy flick." Most of the characters are played with the same underdevelopment as they were written. Don't look for literature or drama here. But if you want light, frothy, sexual titillation... you've found it.