What a waste of my time!!!

An action-packed slog

I didn’t really have many expectations going into the movie (good or bad), but I actually really enjoyed it. I really liked the characters and the banter between them.

The acting in this movie is really good.

Me and my Father decided to try a new film out for our dirty film Friday event and we loved 'The Hills Have Eyes' so decided to give this a shot.I would like to first give you a back story on myself as a person as I feel it is important to know a bit of details on the person reviewing the film. I am a 23 year-old man who hasn't had a girlfriend for a long time and sadly due to my ex-girlfriend moving in with an Alpha male named Chad and moved to America to be with him, I have been forced to live with my Father and dirty film Friday is our way of spending quality time together.Enough of me, onto the film...The first thing that caught my attention was the beautiful scenery and a very authentic looking set. The dialogue was beautifully written and at times actually brought a tear to my eye (If you know what I mean). The fact that a simple film like this would grip me into the story so much within just the first 20 minutes is something that I believe the directors should be extremely proud of.The girls were very good looking too and performed very nicely, well... I think they did I'm a virgin so I'm not 100% sure but my Father seemed to enjoy the film based on that while I took more of a backseat to the acting and plot which was top notch.Hopefully one day I'll meet a red headed vixen like 'Mira ' played by Rebecca Love and I will get a happy ending as in this film.Loved it, one of my personal favourites now and I would recommend it to anyone and everyone.My rating 10/10 My Dads rating 8/10 - He didn't like the plot and thought it was too predictable.

Okay, I'll admit that the neither fish nor fowl genre of soft-core generally does little for me- it has neither the erotic build up of a good R-rated film nor the carnal reality of an X feature. At least some of them are funny.While channel surfing the scenery caught my eye (not that scenery though). The Alabama Hills with snow covered Mount Whitney in the background were beautiful in HD. The production values were quite good- even some of the "normal" acting was OK.The main point of this movie did nothing for me. I found myself fast-forwarding through the bouncing balloon scenes. I even watched to the end to check out the credits and was impressed with the huge list of crew involved. Quality production values, obviously a reasonable budget, even a workable plot- (probably better basic plot than "Tremors" filmed in the same area). It was so poorly executed that even this guy who likes to see top-heavy women gets nothing out of it.PS- I've climbed some of those rocks. They're very rough on the skin; I feel sorry for the poor actresses!

"The Hills Have Eyes" gets the Skinimax treatment in this softie spoof.Bountifully blessed babes are preying on the men crazy enough to set foot near their desolate hillside home where 50 years ago nuclear testing left the are desolate. Some friends go after another friend who was kidnapped and forced to pleasure these insatiable wild women mutants and fall under the spell of "The Hills Have Thighs". Random boffing and crap-tacular music happen at regular intervals. Most are guaranteed to make you laugh or wince. If plasticized beauties and horrid acting are your thing than this one may be for you. But if you are allergic to gratuitous spoofing and monster life preservers than avoid like the plague.

The Hills Have Thighs is Jim Wynorski's latest late night Cinemax T&A flick and conforms pretty well to his past outings. A hiker becomes lost in the wilderness and comes across sexually insatiable mutant cave women who hold him captive for their carnal enjoyment. Two couples that are friends of his go off to try to find and save him, unaware of his true predicament.No time is wasted getting right into the good bits, with two cave women immediately ravishing the unsuspecting hiker. If they could bottle whatever mutated the cave women to look like this, it would put every plastic surgeon in Los Angeles out of business. I have not seen breasts as impressively pumped up as Kylee Nash's since the days of Shae Marks and Pandora Peaks in Andy Sidaris's old spy softcore erotica.All of Julie K. Smith's scenes are amazing as usual. Kylee Nash's scene by the bonfire is easily my favorite in the film and I hope to see her in more in the future. Disappointments were Glori-Anne Gilbert's scene being recycled old footage from a past film (the dreaded flashback scene) and Dianna Terranova, while attractive, not actually getting naked and involved in any of the scenes other than just dancing around. Overall, though, the film is definitely a success for the genre, and is my favorite of Wynorski's parody themed late night romps since The Breastford Wives.