Touches You

Bad Acting and worse Bad Screenplay

Funny, strange, confrontational and subversive, this is one of the most interesting experiences you'll have at the cinema this year.

This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.

I was suckered into paying to see this movie in the theater because of the title and because I like the actors.For 19 years now, this movie has been my standard by which to judge all terrible films.There was no excuse for the distribution of this film.Plodding, meandering, insulting to the intelligence of the viewer, and not a sufficient allegory for the cold war to have made it worth seeing.The only reason to watch this movie is to see how truly awful a movie can be.

The plot is absurd, the logic is absent and the running back and forth across the east-west border is laughable.BUT - it's one of the greatest movies ever made anyway. Why? Because it got a view through correctly adjusted binoculars right! As 1 circle. NOT 2 touching circles.Million dollar movies, close to billion dollar movies from Hollywood, can't even get this simple fact right and it annoys me immensely. The annoying thing is that directors can get access to so much money and are not intelligent enough to get it right. If they spend a hundred dollars more they could buy a consultant to tell them things like that! But the directors are too dumb! Amazing.So a big HOORAY for The Fourth War!! The ONLY other film I remember that avoids this Hollywood dumb cliché is The Bridge On The River Kwai.And that's not all folks. The Fourth War lets the Russians speak Russian. I'm close to tears with enthusiasm! In the Hollywood world where Germans, Russians, Chinese and every alien from outer space speaks American this is groundbreaking. I know that most Americans are too dumb to read subtitles (or rather Hollywood think they are) but it renders authenticity in wast amounts to a movie.The ridiculous script is totally forgiven on these two grounds!!

I would not call this a gripping suspense movie since there are some places that make you laugh when maybe you should not. But if you take the performances of the two colonels and the major general aside, the movie is redeemed two-fold and you end up with some enjoyable entertainment, thanks to Scheider, Prochnow, and Stanton. But, don't expect a realistic post-cold-war scenario. Would two colonels with so many years invested in their careers risk it all just to express personal dislikes of each other? And would the general pussyfoot around so long with an American colonel who's actions could at any time escalate them into a major confrontation? I think not!!! But just watch the movie and you might disagree with this, since all you think about at the time is "will World War III start over a snowball fight?".

I frankly expected more from a Frakenheimer movie. Roy Scheider as Colonel Jack Knowles is okay as the hothead military iconoclast who's not been the same since the war in Vietnam. He is sent to the German-Czech border and wages a personal vendetta against the short-fused Russian colonel Valachev, played quite menacingly by Jurgen Prochnow. The end of detente and the last Cold War battle? Well, Scheider throws a snowball at Prochnow and the fourth war starts. basically that's how. The premise is good but we are treated to a long and meandering tit-for-tat between two Army colonels that borders on the childish and wanton. While occasionally funny, this is not an intelligent movie. You'd be better off watching Toy Soldiers if you want a more gripping story.